King of False Equivalence, Tucker Carlson, got all riled up over Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion’s Grammy’s performance of their 2020 hit, “WAP.” The Daily Beast reported that he was so riled up that he carved out time on his show Monday night to play clips of the raunch, not one, not two, but three times.
Carlson took the time to weave his web of conspiracy during a segment in which he decried the cancellation of Dr. Seuss’s books, Pepe Le Pew and Dumbo. “The cultural vandals in charge of our own cultural revolution have censored everything from cartoon skunks to Peter Pan and Dumbo. THE FILTH!” he shrieked in an attempt at sarcasm. Carlson referred to the recent decisions to discontinue printings of certain Dr. Seuss books, exclude Pepe Le Pew from Space Jam 2, and pull Dumbo from the children’s offerings on Disney+.
But, no critique of Black women would be complete without the Handmaiden of 4c Conservatism, Candace Owens. As if her mere presence weren’t enough to make the ancestors cry, Owens opened her verbal tap dance…er…statement by lamenting the loss of Uncle Ben, Land O’ Lakes, and Aunt Jemima.
“Don’t believe me? “We’ve seen going to the supermarket as a traumatizing experience. We lost Aunt Jemima last year. We lost Land O’ Lakes butter last year. We lost Uncle Ben and his rice last year because everything is so traumatizing for children to look at,” Owens said.
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Owens declared the performance was “virtually” a simulated lesbian sex scene that is a part of a sinister plot to warp children’s minds. That was the last part of the discourse that was even remotely funny, however.
Owens continued, “This seems like an attack on American values, American traditions.” It was then that I felt the ancestors rise up like Della Reese in Harlem Nights when Quick accused Vera of stealing.
American values? Like greed, consumerism, and racism? American traditions? Like two-piecing a stranger over the forehead for the last television on Black Friday? Or is it the tradition of trotting out a Black person who’s so bereft of dignity and logic that they’re willing to be a veritable court jester for white supremacy? Owens claimed that “this” (undefined) is the corrosion of an “empire.”
Unfortunately for Owens, she forgot that America as an empire was built by Black bodies; Black female bodies that birthed the labor required to even conceptualize Fox News.
It’s understood that to go from an obscure vlogger to a Fox News sweetheart. There’s a little bit of soul-selling necessary. But– for Candace Owens to not only link Cardi B and Meg Thee Stallion to the erosion of American values but to pretend as if “American values” aren’t what has her on our televisions with a box perm willing to trade pride for the admiration of white men who have no other skills but complaining about how hard it is to be white men is simply dreadful.
Owens not even having enough sense to be too ashamed to trade the truth of the horrors of this country for a helping of raisin potato salad is beyond the pale (pun intended).
This is not the first time Owens has expressed ill-will towards Cardi B. Back in September, Owens went on Twitter to express how she felt that Cardi B’s interview with then-candidate Joe Biden was a way to pander to Black voters. To date, there is no word from Owens about what she does is called.
